Loving my job again!

A couple of months ago I realized I was becoming very apathetic about this particular patient population I had been taking care of. I found no joy in taking care of these patients. I was watching the same things happen over and over to different patients. I didn't even like admitting these patients following their surgeries. The politics of the area were getting to me. I felt like I was taking it out on my co-workers and a little at home. I don't feel I ever compromised patient care but I really didn't give a SH*T! I was just doing the job. I was dreading going to work.

So I made a change. I sent out an e-mail to the charge nurses that, until further notice, I did not care to take care of this patient population. My request has been honored and I am beginning to love my job again. I look forward to going to work to see what challenge lays ahead of me. Even the days I haven't had the "best" assignments (the sickest, busiest kid on the unit) I have enjoyed turning and suctioning, changing dirty diapers, wiping spit from mouths, for the day. I feel refreshed. I remember why I love what I do. I am taking pride in what I do. I don't miss the politics of the area. Are they still there? Yes. Do they impact me? Not in the same way. I can look away alot easier. I am enjoying working with the PICU doctors again. I feel like my opinion means something. I am making a difference, for the positive, in my patient's and families lives.

Can I tell you how relieved I am?